Navigating Post-High School Options: College, Employment, and Achieving Success with ADHD

What’s the secret to raising successful kids? The answer is simple and complex: seeing and supporting them fully.

When a child feels secure in their caregivers’ love and encouragement, strong self-confidence and self-esteem naturally follow suit. When a child’s ADHD is fully recognized and understood, that is when their strengths get unlocked and futures become clear. How do you get from here to there? One step at a time.

ADHD is like an iceberg. The complexities beneath its surface (including its high co-occurrence with other conditions) are seldom recognized and often criticized unfairly, leading many children with ADHD to develop damaging self-beliefs. They are not lazy or unmotivated or slow; they have a unique neurological footprint. Understanding and communicating that is key.

ADHD impairs executive function — the brain skills we use to succeed in school, work, and other realms of life. You and your child must understand that deficits in executive skills makes it difficult to…

Maturation of the ADHD brain lags about three to five years behind that of the non-ADHD brain.1 The delay affects the brain’s prefrontal regions, which control the aforementioned executive functions and other important cognitive processes. What does this mean? You need to adjust your expectations about your middle schooler or high schooler in comparison to their peers. Developmentally, your 14-year-old’s “executive age” may be closer to 11 or 12 years old, for example. As is the case for many people with ADHD, your child might experience a maturation spurt in their early 20s as the brain continues to develop.

As many as 45% of children with ADHD have a learning difference like dyslexia, dyscalculia, dysgraphia, or another condition that requires academic supports.2  It’s also common for students with ADHD to have learning challenges that affect written expression, memorization of facts, reading comprehension, complex multi-step math, and other areas. Be sure that your child understands how both their ADHD and learning differences show up in the classroom.

As you teach your child about ADHD, be sure to separate them from the condition. Depersonalize ADHD when you approach your child; educate and give your child a choice. Say something like “People with ADHD have trouble getting started, and I’ve noticed that sometimes that’s a challenge for you.”

From disorganization to tardiness, the challenges that children and young teens face in middle and high school are essentially the same challenges that exist in college and at work. Identify your child’s unique learning and executive function challenges early on so that they can receive accommodations and practice using appropriate tools and compensatory strategies in school and beyond.

Expose your child to as many careers as you can while they are in middle school and high school.

Many students with ADHD and learning differences rush into college without a clear path. As a result of this premature launch, they flounder and may ultimately drop out. A gap year can help your child plan out their future, increase their confidence, and seamlessly transition to a new, challenging environment. Most teens and young adults go to college within a year of the gap year experience, and colleges are eager to admit students with such experience.

If a gap year is the best option for your child, work together to create a structured gap year plan. Your child’s gap year may involve taking one community college or technical class, and working part-time or volunteering in a field of interest, for example. Ultimately, the goal is to help your child identify a career path.

Experiencing success in school does wonders for a child, but grades don’t necessarily predict success in life. More often, happiness and wellbeing flow from a positive parent-child relationship.

The content for this article was derived, in part, from the ADDitude ADHD Experts webinar titled, “Getting Ready to Launch: Setting Up Middle and High School Students for Success and Independence” [Video Replay & Podcast #425],” with Chris Dendy, M.S., which was broadcast on October 13, 2022.

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